Saturday, March 18, 2017

Regretting Hell

Have you ever smelled thousands of burning bodies? Have you ever heard the death cries of a thousand dying people? That’s where I was. The pain… the pain was unbearable. I had to pluck out my own eyes because the sight was too terrible to bear. I was in hell.

The screams were like an eerie thunder, you ever heard eerie thunder? Of course not, you’re not where I am. Even though I had gouged out my own eyes, the visual imprint was still stuck in my memory. Hundreds, thousands, millions of us just hanging on meat hooks, all above a  vat of fire. I can’t feel my feet anymore. I think they’re charred to burnt, crisp black.

“Yahoooooo”, a scream erupts in front of me. The demon torturer is back. Then comes the pain as the blade is stuck between my ribs, and then comes the twist, the agony. As the blade turns about, it scrapes against my bones. I grit my teeth and the usual and pathetic thoughts flash through my mind, again. Why am I here? What did I do? I don’t deserve to be here.

All those pathetic thoughts, because the honest truth is that I deserve to be here. The blade jerked out and the demon torturer slashes me a few times before moving on.

"To do the right thing, you have to do the wrong thing. Such is the world of grey. I sold my soul to the devil, what did you do?" a voice from the side came. With great strain, I turned my head to the right, there was another person, and like me he also hung on from meat hooks above a vat of fire.

“Me?” I said. If I could, I’d shrug my shoulders, but that’s not possible with hooks dug deep into the back of your skin. “Killed a few people, hurt some loved ones. Nothing that I regret.”

“Nothing that you regret. Ah… you are a good liar. Anyone who is here, hanging by meat hooks, with hot flames burning underneath and the constant pain given by the demons… what’s there to regret except you are going to be here for the rest of eternity”, he said.

“Bah, you’re foolish, if you think that I’m going to hang here for the rest of this life”, I proclaimed, “I’m going to get down from here and then, I’ll give pain, I’ll be pain”. I don’t know if he could see me, but I let out a big smile. Those thoughts sent a shiver of excitement through me. Such foolish thoughts.  “I don’t regret anything” I continued speaking, “not in the least bit. Unlike you, unlike most of the souls here, I chose to be here. I sold my soul to the devil. When faced with death, you can at least make your life matter and grant someone riches to a loved one.”

Silence reigned between us and I hoped he stopped talking. “Wh-at a-am I talking ab-about”, he wailed out, “I ha-hate th-is. I reall-y do! Urrrrgggghhh”. I glanced to the side. He was in a pain as a demon shoved a spear into his throat.

“Shut your stinking mouth”, the demon cut in. The next thing I heard was my neighbour was screaming out his lungs.

I, honestly, regret nothing. 


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